ASOS is not a website that I stalk religiously. In fact, I don't often go on it at all because I'll only end up spending money. I only really venture over there when people send me tempting links (Twitter is bad for this, very bad) and during the sales, which are gooooooood.
So today I spent my morning tea break idly browsing the shoes and wondering if I actually need a pair of gingerbread men pattern shoes, or whether they're just so flipping cute I am in mad want of them. I'm still pondering that one. I got totally distracted by a little game I like to call Hideous Shoe Hunt. Oh boy, ASOS know how to pick 'em!
Cos I'm a generous soul, I then spent my lunch break picking out the worst offenders to share with you.
Cos I'm a generous soul, I then spent my lunch break picking out the worst offenders to share with you.
Those of a nervous disposition may wish to scroll down to the bottom of the post now...
Cheaper (and probably more stylish) to just strap a box to the bottom of your shoes than buy these, no?
Sorry, don't care if these are Alexander McQueen. You would have to pay me the £265 to wear them. I loathe and detest those tread soles.
So much wrong with these I don't really know where to start.
Does any shoe really need a high-rise with leather uppers and a Liberty floral print and cut-out inserts to the sides and a rolled cuff and an elastic lace closure to the reverse and an open heel design and peep toe styling and a slim sole and a high, plexy heel (which frankly, always remind me of stripper shoes)?
Make it stop. Please.
I think these might be the most awful things I've ever seen.
I may have to stop now before I'm sick. The fringed monstrosity above has had a bad effect on me.
On a positive note, there are some lovely things on there too. Want to see the gingerbread shoes? Course you do!
On a positive note, there are some lovely things on there too. Want to see the gingerbread shoes? Course you do!
I still haven't made my mind up about them. Am I being distracted by their cuteness?
These are also v. sweet.
And I'm seriously considering these, floral and daft as they may be.
I'm afraid I love wedges no matter what. I would definitely wear the black ones you loathe!
ReplyDeleteThe fringing! Oh god, the fringing!
ReplyDeletexx
Thankyou for posting the gingerbread shoes - my eyes needed cheering up after a few of those! The ones at the bottom are definitely the worst...I don't understand them, at all...whyy?!?! x
ReplyDeleteHaha i love this, how refreshing to see some truly ugly shoes rather than a load of beautiful ones that leave me feeling depressed and poor. Particularly enjoying the pink and white things, 3 horrendous shoes rolled into one lol xxx
ReplyDeleteGreen and white things. Obviously.
ReplyDeleteHaha, I love this! The gingerbread shoes are gorgeous, but all the ugly shoes you picked are seriously horrendous, especially the plex heel and scalloped sole ones, bleurgh! XO.
ReplyDeleteI think the second to last nasty ones are actually quite nice, but yes, otherwise, ASOS really do know how to pick ugly damn shoes!
ReplyDeleteI just lost my tea outta my nose.
ReplyDeleteYou need the ginger bread men shoes. The fringing no one needs. Ever.
ReplyDeleteGreat post - made me chuckle!
I was waiting for the shoes with Keep Calm on!
ReplyDeleteWell done Alex, that's a good effort.
Caroline
xxx
Eurgh, there are many minging shoes on ASOS! Most of the time I detest their shoes but there are some gorgeous ones! WHY did you have to show me those gingerbread ones- WHY?! Now I really want them and if that's not bad enough, there are NO SIZE 8's left!!!!!!! You tempter you!!!
ReplyDeleteHaha I love this post, I'm glad I'm not the only one that sees shoes like this and thinks who buys these!
ReplyDeleteGood lord those are some hideous shoes. Why would anyone put these anywhere near their feet?! The brogues are super sweet though! Xo
ReplyDeleteEek! Yeah those floral print cut out tie up perspex heel numbers are truly awful... Loving the gingerbreads tho! Not convinced by floral boots, they seem a bit fussy for me... :)
ReplyDeleteEwwww, nasty shoes. I have to say I quite like the Alexander McQueen ones I wxould swap them for the bottom floral bootee things, yuk! x
ReplyDeleteHahahaha! Those floral cut-out etc etc shoes are truly awful! Who in their right mind would wear them?! I'm glad someone else plays the "find the most hideous .... " game, although I tend to do it with dresses on Topshop's website. My friend and I send each other links trying to out do each other.
ReplyDeleteWell, at least the gingerbread shoes look wearable! :) (Ooops, showing my age!)
ReplyDeleteThe only ones I really wouldn't wear there are those fringed flatforms. They look like Dougal from the Magic Roundabout.
ReplyDeleteSome seriously bad offenders here! Who buys these shoes??? xxx
ReplyDeleteOh jeesh there are some ugly shoes! I think you should definitely get those printed boots though, they're lovely!
ReplyDeleteMaria xxx
oh wow, there are some corkers there! The last fringed monstrosities are literally the ugliest shoes I have ever seen! Top marks for entertainment on this post though =)
ReplyDeletexx
Some real horrors there. Liking the gingerbread shoes though.
ReplyDeleteHaha, brilliant idea for a post! Looks like the size 8 shelf in TK Maxx :( xx
ReplyDeleteI was giggling at the stringed uglies the other day too!!
ReplyDelete