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Friday 6 May 2011

I need some help/advice/encouragement please!

I've won a competition. Yay! I should be full of excitement and glee. Instead I'm bricking it. The prize happens to be a photoshoot with For Your Eyes Only in Manchester. Free makeup, free photoshoot, free photographic print of my best shot. Exciting, yes? Well it might be if I actually liked having my photo taken. I know it sounds odd for someone who posts outfit photos regularly to say that, but I am not photogenic and I have always been very bashful in front of the camera - I only manage it now by using the self timer and staring fixedly at the floor. Put me in front of someone's camera and I do not know what to do with myself.

Oh and did I mention it's a boudoir style photoshoot? All in very good taste - the pics on their website are gorgeous! - but it means being in my underwear or something sort of revealing and that's really not my comfort zone. I won't go into all my body hangups here because it's a long, boring and somewhat self-pitying list, but suffice to say that losing a lot of weight does not somehow magically give you a good body. I am happy with my overall shape now when I've got clothes on but underneath all those layers it's not a pretty sight.

And I'm not the matching underwear sort of girl anyway. I'll have to go and buy something nice that covers all the lumps and bumps and stretch marks and general mingingness. The stress of it all.

So my gut feeling is to go ARGH and not do it because it's scary, but I'm wondering if this is one of those times when my gut is being a pathetic wimp and I should (wo)man up and just get it booked. I've always wanted to be the sort of person who can prance around in their scanties and look and feel sexy. Perhaps they can airbrush me sufficiently so that this is achieved. There's a part of me that does think that after putting so much hard work into the diet, it'd be nice to have some sort of proper proof that I'm not a bloater anymore.



Might have to have a stiff drink on the way there though...

35 comments:

  1. I'm sure it will seem scary initially, but by the end it might be a big confidence boost! If you really feel too shy to go for it, it could be a great gift for a more confident friend! xx

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  2. YES Alex you should do it. Definitely. First of all it will be fun and a great memento for you to have, and secondly, it sounds like you need to face up to some of your fears and this is the perfect opportunity. I used to hate being in front of the camera too, and thought it still isn't my favourite thing to do, I am much more comfortable now just through doing it so often it lost its scariness. Go for a corset/basque type thing if you don't want to show of your tummy xx

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  3. Oh alex is would be fantastic. What about a corset to cover bits up? or sheerish teddies and things? so your covered but still boudoir-y? x

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  4. Yay! You go Alex!
    I have a red nylon negligee with all red feathers around the neckline if you want to use it? And, no, don't ask!!!!
    Or call in Gok Wan for a bit of help!
    It sounds a brilliantly fun thing to do-just take a bottle of champers with you to steady the nerves!
    Z xx

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  5. Gosh, Alex! I personally would hate it(!). I hate having my photo taken and as for the boudoir theme - yikes! Not for me but I can see that it could be a real confidence booster and I know you'll look fantastic. xx

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  6. Go far it girl!

    Firstly there is nothing wrong with being scared, who wouldn't be?
    Secondly you are a beautiful young woman that has curves in all the right places and will ooze charisma on any photo!

    This will be a photo you will look back at and be proud you did. I turned down this kind of opportunity years ago and now that I'm a little older and not as firm I really wish I had grabbed it with both hands.

    Enjoy it, have a few glasses of bubbly and let them work the magic.

    X x

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  7. Do something that scares you... isn't that what they say? Go for it. If you don't like the pic then no one has to see it.
    But by the look of it you'll end up seeing yourself in a whole new (fabulous) light... the pics on the website are fab.
    x

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  8. I'm sure everyone (except maybe glamour models) feels nervous before a boudiour shoot, it's perfectly natural. Do go for it! Something like a basque or babydoll nighty will give the right 'feel' but you won't have to expose too much, their photos on the website are great and yours will be too!

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  9. Hello, thanks for your comment... the top I'm wearing is from H&M (purchased just before my challenge started) it's a pale cream colour - if that makes sense!

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  10. Oh wow Alex - a real life How To Look Good Naked!! It'll be brilliant to look back on - go for it! Do what Gok does with his ladies and maybe go for an underwear fitting (I got measured properly for bras last week and what a difference - bought a load of new well-fitting underwear and feel great in it!), get your hair done or even just give it a deep-condition, pamper your skin in preparation for the shoot and you'll feel great.

    The photos are for their own portfolio as well presumably so they're not going to make them unflattering, they'll be gorgeous! I'm sure they'll put you at ease and once you get into it I bet you even start to enjoy it! Woooo, I'm really excited for you! xxxx

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  11. Go for it Alex!! And yes it is a bit like Gok's show ;) Don't buy an underwear set that's not really "you", buy something you like but haven't dared try.. and enjoy it. I'm sure it'll be a great experience, and like you say, a lovely proof of how far you've come. xx

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  12. This is such an opportunity and most people wont get a chance to have a go at it. You should definately attack it and go in full steam! If they're website pictures look good then they know how to get the best out of their clients. You rock it girl and prove just how far you've come. They'll make sure you're all confortable. Deep breath, stiff drink and pose :D
    http://cgdn.blogspot.com

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  13. Alex you should definately go for it! It will be an amazing reminder of how far you have come :)

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  14. I don't like having my photo taken either, but I think you should go for it - with the help of a stiff drink first if needed. I agree with the others about trying a basque/corset type of thing. I bet you'll look gorgeous!

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  15. i think that scary things are good sometimes, i will come and hold your hand (metaphorically as i'm sre that would embarrass you!) if you like..

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  16. I have seen really sexy picture where women have a worn either a denim or white shirt and bare legs - gorgeous x

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  17. Hmm hard to say - if you think its just shyness/lacking in confidence that is holding you back, I'd say go for it, plus you have the added bonus of getting to shop for gorgeous underwear! But if you think you'd be uncomfortable in that you're posing in underwear, whatever, then I'd say no, but totally your call! :)

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  18. Do it. Book it. You will be fabulous. I have a photographer friend who does boudoir shoots, and a good photographer will be able to put you at ease in underwear or more clothes, and help you to find positions that show off all your best bits. Now get yourself to a class underwear shop and buy yourself some pretty and matching underwear!

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  19. Alex, without wishing to sound like a perv, I can think of no one more suited to a Boudoir shoot than you.

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  20. I did a similar shoot, there are lots of photos on my blog 'dare to bare' last month. They can airbrush you so you look your best. Wear things that you feel comfortable wearing for sure. It is a massive confidence boost, so take the plunge, you won't regret it - wish I had won the chance to do it again!

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  21. DO IT! You never know, it might be the boost of confidence you need to see how beautiful you are :) I did a (clothed) photoshoot a couple of years ago, I was pretty self conscious of what I was doing with my facial expression/hands/legs (it's surprising hard to do a good pose without a mirror!), but the photographer always knows what kind of poses compliment the way you look and they give you guidance. It'd be such a good experience definitely go for it! x


    Just a Thought

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  22. I think you should just go for it! Maybe have a drink first.

    Laura is such a perv.

    Caroline
    xxx

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  23. I think Laura's comment is one of the best! And Alex, I think you should do it, like you said after losing the weight it would be a great way to boost your confidence and it might be fun. I know exactly what you mean though and it will probably be extremely nerve-wracking but trust me, you will look beautiful. And thank you for the scavenger hunt list :) xxx

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  24. Wow- how exciting! I'd be nervy too, but I think its a fantastic idea. You're looking great, and you're gonna be FAB :)

    Thank you for your sweet comment! xxx

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  25. First, I want to give you a great big hug! Second, the trick to photography is knowing your angles and enhancing what you have while cleverly hiding your "flaws". For example: I am about 5'5, curvy athletic with a small waist. I am often asked to do bikini fashion shows, and then they take a million photos of me, some of which turn out great (from the right angle) and some I have to untag myself from because I just look awfully short and chubby - which I really am not. So, practice a little, pick the perfect things to wear and then just be confident.. and yes if you really are unhappy, you can still airbrush. Just make sure you end up looking like yourself in the end. You can do it!





    www.trustme-itsparadise.blogspot.com
    www.renegadeloverrr.tumblr.com

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  26. Face your fear!
    After the first few minutes I bet you'll be OK. You'll feel so good afterwards and I'm sure the photos will look fantastic.
    Imagine how you'd regret not doing it later on in life.

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  27. Ive had one of those photoshoots done! they really put you at ease! If you dont feel comfortable in matchy matchy lacy bits, get some really funky polka dot stuff or some vintage inspired undies, like a chemise or a vest and french knickers set! They basically encourage you to bring any clothes, accessories, jewellery, shoes etc that you like, and they do airbrush you so dont worry about that!! Everytime i feel a little bit crap about myself i get my calendar out that i had done and it makes me feel SO MUCH BETTER about how i look!! its a fantastic experience, you will really enjoy it
    Becki x x

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  28. Awww congratulations, just down a pint or two first and have the time of your life. You're gorgeous anyway and their job is to make everyone even more fabulous or they'd be out of business.
    Enjoy. xxx

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  29. Dearest Alex, that will be amazing! Yes have a stiff drink. They should be able to advise you of best angles etc. There's ways of posing to make your legs look longer and enhancing your best bits. The photographer will know how to get the best shot. You'll be surprised by the results. What a lovely thing to do, you'll be glad you did it. Much love, C xx

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  30. GET HAMMERED! I so would. And you might find it really liberating!

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  31. Yep,GET HAMMERED!!!
    Hahahaha.You ARE a total hottie,but there's nothing to make a girl more self concious than the thought of being photographed in very little.......
    You'll be SPECTACULAR!!!
    love! XXX

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  32. My guess is that you will brick it right up until you have the first photo taken and then you will forget all about your nerves. I know a few friends who have had a similar thing and they have all said it was so much fun, the photographer put them at so much ease that they really lost all fear. Go have fun xx

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  33. I think you should go for it, Alex. It'll be fun and a totally unique experience - it'll be good to move out of your comfort zone and challenge yourself to do it. I'm sure you'll feel really proud of yourself and delighted with the end results. xx

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  34. Oh I definitely think you should go for it - you've achieved so much with your weight loss, you deserve some wonderful snaps.

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  35. Ok, first off this made me laugh. Because you're so fabulously descriptive. Secondly, woman, just do it. You're gorgeous, you've done tremendously well at the whole weight loss thing and look fab, thirdly, if you're not happy, bin the pic, fourthly, imagine the confidence boost in simply doing it and proving to your inner critic that you can. That's a lot of counting...

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