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Going Solo

Monday, 23 September 2013

On the list of Things I Don't Understand, why people can't just do things by themselves is right up at the top. Admittedly, lots of things are better shared (conversations, for example, do not work quite so well if there's only one of you as you tend to look like a crazy person) but doing things by yourself is so liberating. There's no drama, no compromises, no fannying around waiting for other people to make their mind up.

People always react weirdly to me saying that I've gone to the cinema or for a meal/drink by myself. Why?? I genuinely don't get it. Is it because they think I'm a billy-no-mates and pity me? Or is it because they think it's some big, bold thing to do? Cos if it's the former I actually don't give a shit what they think and if it's the latter, they're just plain wrong.

One night last week I did the following:

Went to Yo Sushi by myself.

No laughing at my inability to use proper chopsticks, eh?

Went to Primark by myself. Quickest shopping trip ever. I saw this Kermit onesie in the window and it was so GLORIOUS I couldn't resist. Bish, bash, bosh: in and out in 5 minutes.

Went to see In A World by myself.

Had a glass of wine by myself and read a book.

(see the top photo. Marvel at my first-generation Kindle.)

Went to see Rush by myself.

I didn't do any of it because no-one would go with me or because I was being some kind of brave soldier. I did it cos I wanted to and that was the important thing that night. Pleasing me, not anyone else.

Plus, and I really can't stress this enough, especially for those of you who might be reluctant to try the going solo thing, no-one gives a flying fuck that you don't have a boyfriend/best friend/relative/random stranger with you. Why would they? Doing things by yourself is not weird. Especially not the cinema. You're sitting in the dark! No-one can see you!


  1. I hear you! I always go clothes shopping and craft shopping by myself, I hate having people in tow. I've been to see a couple of films by myself too and couldn't care less about it. Maybe it's because i'm happy and ok with my own company and stuff.

  2. Before I met the Husband, I went to gigs, the cinema, the theatre etc on my own!! I loved it and never felt lonely. People rely too much on others these days.
    Rocking the kermit onesie, very lush!
    x x

  3. I usually like to spend time with myself. Sometimes your own company is the most appropriate when it comes to enjoy a movie, shopping or cooking. Besides, people distract me when I try to watch a film. x

  4. Couldn't agree more! I have actually started to avoid clothes shopping with others as I hate waiting around for others... which maybe taking it a little too far but sod it - my time is precious!

  5. I much prefer shopping in my own especially in places like Primark - and charity shopping. It means I can take my time to look through every single damn rail if I want to without feeling I'm holding someone up!
    I love going for breakfast on my own - it gives me some genuine reflective time and I feel a little bit a peace with myself and the world. And I really love being home alone. I have friends who can't stand it and purposely invite people over if there other half or parents are away whereas I relish the chance to do whatever I damn well please!

    Jenni x

    Bows Bangles & Bakes

  6. They must be really insecure not to appreciate their own company?!!!

    Love the Kermit onesie:-)


  7. Yes love this! I love being by myself, especially on the film watching. Although I must admit it's fun being able to dissect it with someone after... ;)

  8. Too right! I've been on holiday by myself, often used to see a film alone and definitely have no qualms about popping into a pub for a drink if I fancy one.

  9. This post really made me smile, I love doing things alone it's no big deal some times I prefer it. Shopping alone is one of my favourite pass times, going for walks and driving to a park and spending the afternoon reading a book is lovely. I don't understand the need to have someone else there in order to validate and activity. One day I would like to go on holiday alonex

  10. Oh thank GOD I'm not alone on this. I have no qualms about doing things on my own. When I moved to a new town I had to do stuff on my own whilst I got to know people. Going to a film on my own feels wonderfully indulgent (no compromise on film choice and you don't talk to whoever you go with anyway) and a meal out with a book is a treat. I've been to countless gigs alone. If I'd waited for other people I wouldn't have done half of what I have.

  11. I love this post!!! I go walking by myself back home a lot with just my head-phones for company and I always get weird looks too, I don't get it! Also going to the cinema alone sounds brilliant - I need to try that one and the meal one too. - Tasha xxx

  12. I love going for meals by myself, I always feel like a spy!

    Maria xxx

  13. I definitely agree with the rest of you, going at it alone can be very indulgent and relaxing! I love knowing that I have no time constraints, compromising or someone else's comfort to worry about; instead I get to do exactly what I want.

  14. Hear, hear. I've been going to movies by myself since I was 17. I do it even more often now because the closest movie theatre is only a five-minute walk away. It's fun to get together with friends, but sometimes I just want to see whatever I want to see without coordinating times and schedules and having to decide.

  15. Great post. I dont think i would like to do somethings alone but I've always wanted to go to the cinema on my own. I don't think i would go unless i really wanted to see something and couldn't find anyone to go with me. I go to zumba on my own and i was thinking the other day.......why do i always seem to be the one on my own, i felt quite embarrassed to begin with but then i realised the reason im the only one is because other people daren't do things alone and i feel quite sorry for them for that xxx

  16. Lovely post Alex. I have no qualms about doing most things alone - otherwise I'd never do ANYTHING! - but the cinema is a real sticking point for me. It's the waiting around bit beforehand that troubles me, and it's a shame because I end up missing films I'd love to see :( xx


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